I am offended for the government insulting my male friends and relatives

Mannequin (Photo credit: Night-thing)

I feel really REALLY offended.

I am SURE the men in my life do not go about raping people. PERIOD.

They do not have to ‘control their desires’. Nope, raping does not even feature in their list of desires.

When they would see a drunken girl on the street, they will help her, no matter what she is or is not wearing. They will NOT rape her.

I have gone on various shopping trips with guys who are friends, they never got ‘excited’ even when sometimes the store keeper changed the entire mannequin’s clothes!

So when  BMC stated that:

“Ban lingerie on mannequins in order to fight sex crimes,

In a move to prevent “wrong acts” by men and to provide for women safety, the  Brihanmumbai Municipal Corporation has cleared a proposal banning the display of lingerie on mannequins in Mumbai, reported CNN-IBN.

The proposal has been cleared on the grounds that such mannequins will excite men and pose a danger to women”

Are we being told here that men are vile, cannibalistic and mindless animals who get excited  by seeing any female form, even if it is made of plastic, and then go about raping anyone they meet?

I am deeply offended.

Related articles

• After lingerie mannequin ban, Mumbai politicians want ban on lingerie ads too (ndtv.com)
• Indian city considers mannequin ban to curb sex crime (newsinfo.inquirer.net)
• “Such mannequins will excite men and pose a danger to women.” (indianhomemaker.wordpress.com)
• Mumbai bans lingerie-clad mannequins to save men from ‘impure thoughts’ (telegraph.co.uk)
• It may be curtains for lingerie on mannequins in Mumbai (thehindu.com)
• ‘No dummies tummies!’ Indian mannequins covering up to cut sex crimes (wikkorg.wordpress.com)
• ‘Indecent’ mannequins banned in Mumbai for fear of inciting rape (irishtimes.com)
• Indian City Considers Banning Mannequins Wearing Lingerie (businessinsider.com)

Love Story Of A Ferarri

Ferrari 550 Maranello (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Once upon a time there was a poor farmer. His family earned money by tilling, plowing, sowing and all other farm related activities. But the farmer was not satisfied. He wanted more.

The farmer’s family saved up enough money to send the farmer off to the city of dreams.

Once the farmer entered the city of dreams he opened up his own business. His business was an instant success. The farmer’s business grew leaps and bounds, he was now trading internationally.

Once he had enough money to last a lifetime, he hired a good manager and went back to his village with his family. The manager called him once everyday and reported the day-to-day activities. All the farmer had to do was go to the city once every month to take care of major decisions.

The farmer decided he wanted a car. And being so rich, he wanted to get the best car of the world. His family asked him to buy a bullock cart. They told him we live in a village, no one has ever bought a car. Why do you want a car? It is against our traditions. A Car would never mix up with our lifestyle. You just want a means of transportation, a bullock cart would meet your needs.

But, the farmer did not listen to them, and went around to search for the best car of the world. One day he saw a photo of a car and instantly fell in love with it. On inquiring, he came to know that its name was Ferrari and it lived in a town called Maranello. He also came to know that it was the best car in the world. His happiness knew no bounds and he decided to go and meet Ferrari.

On reaching Maranello, he straightaway went to the factory and met the Ferrari manufacturers. After a few talks, within a few days, Ferrari was his.

Ever since Ferrari was born, she always knew she was special. She was proud of herself and knew she was to be compared with no other car.

When she met the farmer for the first time, she was a bit skeptical of him. But as they travelled from Maranello to his village, the days she spent with him were few of the best days of her life. He treated her as the queen and spoiled her silly with the best fuel and would not even let a speck of dust settle on her. He got the best quality leather seats for her and drove her at high speeds on the roads. And it was in these days the Ferrari fell for the farmer. She loved everything about him, but most of all, she loved the way he treated her.

It took a few months for them to reach the farmer’s village, and till that time, both were happy and totally in love with each other.

Once they reached the village, Ferrari was shocked to see the dusty, broken roads, but as she was in love with the farmer she did not say a word. As days passed, the farmer became busy with his family and work and on some days he would not even come to visit Ferrari.

Ferrari would be covered in dust every time they went for a drive together and the roads of the village were so bad, Ferrari could not race anymore on those roads.

She was heartbroken. The farmer, who cared for her so much, no longer seemed to care for her. She cried till she could cry no more.

When she complained to the farmer about it, he told her: “I don’t know what you mean. I have not changed. This is me. And I will not change for you.”

Ferrari felt her heart had been taken out and stomped on by the farmer. She went into depression and would not talk or go on a drive with anybody. Not even the farmer.

The farmer was now angry and frustrated with the Ferrari. He had spent so much money on her and she refused to let him drive her! He called the manufacturers and complained about the Ferrari.

The manufacturers told him: ” Ferrari is special and will always be so. Even if you have the money to buy a Ferrari, you still need to work on making her feel special every single day. She deserved that. Nothing else. Nothing less. You cannot buy a Ferrari and treat it like a bullock cart.”

The farmer was shocked to hear this. He knew deep in his heart they were right. He had always seen how his father, grandfathers, uncles and neighbors treat their bullock carts and he made the mistake of treating his Ferrari in the same way.

He ran to his garage and apologised to Ferrari. Ferrari at first refused to believe him. But, farmer started caring for his Ferrari again. He started treating her like a queen again. He even remodeled his village roads for her. And slowly, Ferrari started loving him again.

And then, they lived happily ever after.Sure, there were a few troubles, but farmer and Ferrari always remembered how special they were for each other and solved their troubles as a team.

THE END

Hitting Facebook where it hurts

Facebook’s stocks are going down since last week.

Reason?

The #FBRape campaign, started by Laura Bates of Everyday Sexism and Jaclyn Friedman of WAM!

To know more about this campaign, visit: http://www.womenactionmedia.org/facebookaction/

I have personally come across Facebook’s highly sexist attitude towards women.

I had come across a highly graphic photo on Facebook that showed in step-by-step pictures “How to stone a woman to death”, the pictures even specified the size of the pit, the weight of the stones and the distance to throw the stones for it to be very ‘effective’.

When I reported this post, Facebook wrote back that the photo did not violate any of its community guidelines!

However, it blocked the photo of a woman who was showing the correct way to breast feed a newborn baby for new mothers and blocked the uploader from Facebook for 30 days!

So, dear Facebook, how to kill women is OK, but how to nurse a baby is “graphic violence and pornography”?

There are several scantily clad girls, who leave nothing to imagination, various photos of badly bruised girls with captions of “Women deserve rights…and lefts” or “Next time don’t get pregnant” all these do not fall under “Graphic violence and pornography” BUT a scientific representation of vulva that was uploaded to educate women on their bodies was banned!

Really Facebook, what’s up with that?

Even after millions of people reporting such photos, Facebook did nothing!

So, this campaign was started requesting the advertisers, whose ads are seen on such pages, to withdraw their money.

Some have already done, some are in talks

Give in your support.

Related articles

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• Facebook can’t keep turning a blind eye to the women-haters it enables (newstatesman.com)
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• What is #FBrape? (femborg.wordpress.com)
• Facebook and Misogyny (comeupscreaming.wordpress.com)
• Facebook Nudity and Pornography Policy Contradiction (digitalhighrise.com)
• How much intolerance does it take? (deliberatedonkey.wordpress.com)
• Campaign targets anti-women Facebook groups (news.com.au)

 

Because You Are A Girl, You Are Not To Enjoy

What, where, how, whom and why

All these questions before saying goodbye

Your parents, neighbours, uncles and aunties,

Together will decide if you can go to all those parties

Even the smallest decision of your life,

Has to be dissected by all with a sharp knife

A mere mention of for higher study,

Is enough to label you as nutty

And if for your studies you wish to leave the state,

THEY will be sure to give you looks of hate

And to your poor father who agreed thinking you deserved a better fate,

THEY will be sure to say: You are spoiling your daughter at this rate

Allowing a girl to enjoy her like is a dangerous idea

When our tradition for girls is to follow only one mantra:

‘GET MARRIED

STAY MARRIED”

So, dear modern girl, with your ideas to enjoy,

All these joys are reserved only for our darling boys.

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Happy Birthday, Dad!

Happy Birthday! (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

“Do you think I could ever be a father?”

“A good father?”

“Yes. Like yours. A man with a head, a heart, and a soul. A  man capable of listening, of leading and respecting a child, and not of drowning his own defects in him. Someone whom a child will not only love because he’s his father but will also admire for the person he is. Someone he would want to grow up to resemble.”

The above quote is written by Carlos Ruiz Zafon’s The Shadow of the Wind.

Reading this I knew that Yes, I have a good father.

Happy birthday, Dad

I have my dad to thank for a lot.

He did all the things a typical dad would do – taught me how to ride a cycle, always gave me more money than I what I had asked for. sometimes even without asking, he drove me around whenever I needed a ride.

He even did a lot of things typical dads do not do, and that makes him all the more special!

He taught me how to swim, tried to teach me how to catch ball (Unfortunately did not succeed in that 😦 )

He taught me to find pleasure in reading, he introduced me to the wonderful world of stories. When I was a kid, he would pick me up every night and tell me stories while walking till I fell asleep. He gifted my first novel (when I was afraid to pick up one for myself looking at the size!), it was “Famous Five:Five go off in a Caravan”. That is the book from which my journey into the book-land started and now I have become a bookaholic. Thank You Dad For That!

Ever since I was a kid, he carried us off to various parts of the country once or twice every year. He encouraged us into adventurous sports, it is because of him I can say I have done a lot of stuff I would have otherwise never got a chance to do, like rappelling, paragliding, water rafting, trekking etc

In a country where a girl’s education is stopped so that her brother’s education can be funded, I am proud to say, that my dad spent more on my education than my brother’s! (I choose a costlier program than him!! 😉 ), he did not think twice before sending me to study outside the city in a college of my choice. I t is because of that education, I have become a whole lot better person (I hope!). And I got nobody but dad to thank for this!

So, have an awesome day ahead dad!

Happy Birthday!

The Fear Of The Unkown.

My grandfather is associated with an NGO  called “Shram Mandir” 

This NGO takes in leprosy patients , treats them and teach them various vocations to make them self reliant.

On taking with the directors and the people in charge, I found that, even though curable, this disease has a huge social stigma attached to it.

There were kids abandoned by parents and people abandoned by families who live here even after they are cured, as the family is not ready to accept them back!

Leprosy is not contagious and it has a long incubation period (time before symptoms appear),

Isolating people with this disease in “leper colonies” is not needed, still, isolation is done in large numbers. Instead, they should be taken to proper hospitals where such treatments is available.

surprisingly, its early symptoms are very easily recognisable, and if treated early, there is a good chance of 100% recovery.

The most easily recognisable symptom is that id there is a boil on your body which is lighter than your normal skin colour, and that part has decreased or no sensation to touch, pain or heat than make sure to have yourself tested.

Here I would like to share story of 6-year-old oy Raju. During medical camp at his municipal school, doctor found a boil on his hand which was not responding to heat. Raju’s parents were asked to visit the hospital and undergo a few tests.

Once the tests results were out, it became clear that Raju (Names have een changed to protect the true identities) was suffering from leprosy. Instead of going home, his parents brought his straight to Shram Mandir and aandoned him there. The poor boy was out of his mind with grief as he just could not comprehend where his parents where.

He stayed in the NGO for a few years and with help of proper medications, he was able to eliminate all traces of his disease.

His parents were informed and had to be persuaded to take him back.

It’s strange that when people have TB or cancer, people care for them, but if they have leprosy, they are instantly dumped.

We should be more aware and care for the people with such diseases and not give them more pain than they are already suffering.

And if you see a boil put a drop of hot water on it, if there is no sensation, have yourself checked, immediately.

(THIS POST IS WRITTEN FOR INDIBLOGGER’S “The Moral Of The Story Is…” Contest, check out more entries on My healthy speak blog)

 

Because You Are A Girl, You Are Not To Choose What You Wear

(Photo credit: Wikipedia)

All you modern girls in jeans

With your eyes full of dreams

What will you get by aping the west?

Like a GOOD Indian you should be dressed

We will decide what you will wear

And how should you style your hair

Wear a sari is what we expect

Can’t you do this much, as a sign of our respect?

You do not know how to tie a sari does not matter

It just shows bad upbringing on the part of your mother

If wearing a sari you do not like

Then its our traditions that you dislike

It is because of you and your modern clothes

Random men on the streets become your foes

Even after this, if it’s the westerners you want to ape,

Then don’t come back to us when you encounter rape

As this is the treatment that you asked for and deserved

As our NATIONAL clothing you did not preserved

So, dear girl, wear only a sari you should,

Listen to us, as its only for your safety and good.

****************************************************************************************************

AUTHOR’S NOTE:

In India girls who wear ‘modern’ clothes are frowned upon. It can be seen in major movies, serials etc traditional sari clad girls are always ‘Good’ and jeans and skirt wearing girls are frowned upon for ‘blindly copying western culture’ or ‘no respect for indian values’.Even if a girl’s parents allow her to wear western clothes, after marriage she can only do so with her in-law’s PERMISSION

As if this was not enough if a MODERN Woman (read who wears jeans and t-shirts) goes to report a rape, everyone, from the politicians to media will put the ENTIRE blame on the girl with sentences like ‘SHE ASKED FOR IT’ or ‘THE GUY WAS JUST TEACHING HER A LESSON IN INDIAN VALUES’ or ‘SHE WAS WEARING A SKIRT, OBVIOUSLY IT IS A INVITATION FOR THE GUY’. It’s not that sari clad women are safe either, but due to social conditioning they are also looked down upon like she must have done something to invite this upon her.

And now, even in 2012, there are various groups of people who feel that they can molest any random girl to teach her MORAL values 😦

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Read Harry Potter prequel: By J. K. ROWLING here!

English: Coat of arms of Hogwarts school of witchcraft and wizardry from Harry Potter book series, by J.K Rowling. For a reference i used a drawing found on the internet, probably an illustration from one of the books. vector drawing,.SVG format. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

The Harry Potter prequel is an 800-word story written by J. K. Rowling, and was published online on 11 June 2008. Set about three years before the birth of Harry Potter, the story recounts an adventure experienced by Sirius Black and James Potter.

Need I say more? 🙂 🙂

Its available for free download on: http://www.goodreads.com/book/show/9658936-harry-potter

 

If you like Harry Potter, do visit:

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Because You Are A Girl, You Are Not Entitled To Love

Dear Daughter, We love you,

Because we are your parents, that is true.

But then you decided to fall in love,

Now death or separation lies in fate of you and your beloved.

How could you put us through so much shame?

Don’t you have any respect for your family’s name?

We have not chosen him for you,

And that is the reason enough for you to bid him adieu.

So what if he is rich, funny, handsome and smart?

So what if he loves you truly with all his heart?

It does not even matter that he is ready to put down his life,

Just to see you happy and make you his for wife.

The guy of our choice you will marry,

Or else your body we will have to bury.

So, dear girl, the choice is entirely up to you.

Don’t fall in love, so that we can love you.

****************************************************

Author’s note:

This applied to Indian boys as well.

Good Indian boys and girls are not allowed to fall in love.Love is for ‘bad’, ‘uncultured’ people. This is what is drilled into young Indian’s head since childhood.

This is now changing, as more young adults are now having love marriages, but they have to face a LOT OF emotional blackmail and drama and what not to get married by their own choice.

Even if parents agree, it’s always with a sad face and after repeatedly talking about how they have to ‘sacrifice’ for their children.

Ask them how and what exactly are they sacrificing? And you get answers like honor and place in society. Sometimes it feels that Indian parents care more for their reputation in society than their own kids happiness.

And plus, if choice marriages happen, elders loose their control over their male ‘children’. If the son marries for love, he will stand by his wife and will not allow her to be humiliated and treated like a maid or ask of dowry. But his parents, who feel they are entitled to certain ‘privileges’ for giving birth to a boy, feel betrayed.

So they try to push him in all possible ways to get him into an arranged marriage. So the guy does not feel for the girl, he will not ‘oppose’ to any demands from his parents that they put on the girl. And the girl, who does not know either her husband or the in-laws, has to meekly follow.

Also, because of the ‘paraya dhan’ concept, her parents also do not support her and ask her to ‘adjust’.

This ensures the power lies with the boy’s family.

Love marriages shake this basic model of patriarchy that has been so thoroughly ingrained in out parent’s minds, its tough to break it.

Kudos to those parents who support love marriages, you ROCK!

And GET WELL SOON to those parents who feel their and their society’s happiness comes before their children.

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• “His parents had already found a girl from his community who they feel is ‘perfect’ for him.” (indianhomemaker.wordpress.com)
• Does a girl ever not be a ‘parayi’? (thereandtheir.wordpress.com)
• Daughter-in-law should not be treated as domestic help, says Supreme Court (indianhomemaker.wordpress.com)
• How India Mass Produces Ram Singhs (thereandtheir.wordpress.com)
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Heart in a Box

Medicine has grown leaps and bound, from the Ayurveda to the tantric and then to hospitals, there has been a sea of change.

There was a time when amputations were carried on patients without anesthesia..the sheer amount of pain that the patient must have gone through  cannot even be imagined.

But, Modern healthcare has facilitated to cure problems diseases which before had been considered incurable or life threatening!

Due to the advancement of technology, Modern healthcare has been able to achieve what could be termed as nothing but miracle!

A few years back, what needed a major surgery now only needs a small needle insertion.

Some hospitals also have robotic operations, so the chances of operation failing reduces to a great extent.

Here I would like to give an example of Grey’s Anatomy, where Christina has to walk around with a LIVE heart in a box!

It just gives you hope, that when something happens to you and your loved ones, you will be taken care of, and that is comforting.

(This post is written for Indiblogger’s ‘How does Modern Healthcare touch lives?’ contest by Apollo Hospital http://www.apollohospitals.com/cutting-edge.php)

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